A Haunted House

Last week, I picked up a load of my old things from my parents' basement. Among them was a folder from my high school creative writing class.

When I was in high school, I seriously considered being a writer. (I still do. I know I'm not a great writer, and I've really fallen out of practice, as you can see from my blog.) I thought I was pretty danged creative. I got a pretty good chuckle from looking over these papers. Things that I remember thinking were brilliant were sub par at best. However, it was still entertaining, and now I'm going to pass along something for you, very apropos for this week.

This story had no title, and I couldn't find the date of its final revision, but it was originally written around October 9, 1998. I found numerous grammatical/punctuation errors, but left them as is. Enjoy!

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Ryan slowly pulled open the door to the house. As it creaked open, Ryan could have sworn he heard the moans and shrieks of a hundred angry ghosts waiting for him to come in. He was not only afraid, but petrified of what lay inside waiting for him. Ryan hesitated to enter. And then he was pushed inside from behind. Ryan screamed.

“Ha ha!” an evil, menacing laugh from behind him sounded. It was Chuck—the reason why Ryan was here in the first place. “A little scared Cryin’ Ryan?”

“No,” Ryan said. He wasn’t lying, of course, because he wasn’t a little scared. He was terrified. He couldn’t let Chuck find out, though. He had to hide it. He had to be brave.

“Did you bring a sleeping bag?” Chuck asked.

“Yes.”

“Flashlight?”

“Yes.”

“Teddy bear?” Chuck giggled after saying this.

“No,” Ryan snapped back.

“Hey! Chill out. I just thought you might get lonely, that’s all.” Chuck shoved Ryan. “I’ll be back in a little while to check on you. If you get too scared, don’t go for help, because if you do, you’ll never hear the end of it.” Chuck laughed as he walked out the door.

“Stupid Chuck,” Ryan whispered to himself. I could be out trick-or-treating right now, he thought, but instead, I’m stuck in this stupid old house. It was, of course, Chuck’s fault. He had triple-dog-dared Ryan to spend the night in the house because Ryan had been stupid enough to open his mouth. He had actually been dumb enough to call Chuck a liar and tell him that the old house wasn’t haunted. After all, there was no such thing as a haunted house.

Ryan’s thoughts were interrupted by a thud directly above his head. He almost wet his pants.

“Hello! Is anyone up there?” he called out. There was no answer. Ryan was about to calm down, when he heard a scraping sound from the same place where the thud had sounded. “What do you want?” Ryan yelled up the staircase. There was still no answer.

Ryan started to walk up the stairs slowly with flashlight in hand. As he was about to reach the top step, he heard a knocking. He paused. The knocking grew louder and faster. It was coming from a room a few yards away. Be brave, Ryan, be brave. And then, the ghost spoke.

“Help!” it moaned. “Help me!” Ryan wanted to run, but he had to be brave. “Help me, Ryan!”

All right. That’s it. He knows my name. He’s going to kill me. I’m getting out of here. Ryan was about to run down the stairs, when the ghost spoke again.

“Ryan, help! It’s me, Chuck!” Chuck! What a jerk! Ryan walked right up to the door of the room and flung it open. There was Chuck, lying in the middle of the floor.

“What are you doing here?!” Ryan demanded.

“I was coming to scare you. I climbed through the window and I fell and twisted my leg. I tried to crawl across the floor, but it hurts too much. Didn’t you hear me knocking to get your attention?” Chuck’s eyes pleaded with Ryan. Ryan, however, took advantage of the moment. The school bully was lying on the floor, and he couldn’t do anything to hurt Ryan. Ryan walked over to Chuck and kicked him. “Ouch! What did you do that for?”

“You jerk! You were going to scare me!” He kicked him again. “I’m leaving.” He turned to walk away.

“No! Ryan! Don’t leave me here! Help me!” Chuck started to bawl. Ryan laughed, but his back was turned so Chuck couldn’t see it. He continued walking. He went right out the door and slammed it behind him. He intended to get help, but he was going to let Chuck suffer first. He deserved it. He was still bawling upstairs, but Ryan didn’t really care. Ryan picked up his things and left the haunted house.

Chuck was still laying alone in the middle of the floor. “Help! Ryan! If you don’t get back up here right now, I’ll kill you! I swear!” There was no answer. Chuck started to bawl again. He was interrupted by someone else moaning. He immediately shut up. “Who’s there?” The moaning continued. And then, he heard footsteps. They were coming down the hall, towards the door. They were getting faster, and faster until they were right outside. “Who is it! Ryan? Is that you?” And then the door flew open. Chuck screamed at the top of his lungs.

NOW could I drink hot blood?!

This post started out as a list of all of my current theatrical vents, as well as an explanation of the fact that I’m having doubts about my career in theatre. It then switched halfway through into the positive side of every vent. Because I’m trying to look on the positive side of things lately, I deleted all of the negative things, but I left the positive parts. Also, it seemed like I was looking for sympathy, which I’m not. I just needed a place to get things out, and my blog used to be that place. As life slows down a little over the summer, I’m going to make an effort to blog more. That’s a lie. I’m going to THINK about making an effort.

Anyway, here are the flipsides of all of my recent theatrical woes:

• The way I felt about my job at the end of the school year was leaps and bounds better than the beginning of the school year, and the administration is doing everything they can to make me happy so I come back next year.
• I lost a directing job I wanted, but then another fell into my lap which is turning out to be a blast, AND! I’m getting paid almost twice as much as the other would have paid. Also, it’s only going to last a month as opposed to two. AND!!! I get to rehearse in the afternoons so I can be home with Lauren at night. Last, but not least, my staff is fantastic, and the cast is a fun group of kids.
• If people are going to be dishonest around me, I don’t ever HAVE to work with them again!
• Art is to make people think, and not always enjoy. For instance, I saw the movie The Invention of Lying recently, and while I HATED it, I was able to find the art in it and appreciate that aspect. If somebody lies to my face about how much they liked something I was involved with, it’s their problem. Not mine.
• If I don’t end up directing the musical I wanted to do in the near future, it will leave an opening in a very strategic place for me.
• Even though I’m sick TO DEATH of music directing, it’s invigorating to have the opportunity to work closely with brilliant directors like Dave Tinney and Chris Clark. I learn more from them in one rehearsal than I ever did in any of my directing classes in college.
• I’d much rather hear about backstage drama after the fact than let it ruin my outlook at the time.
• A master’s degree would take at least 2 years, and if I got one, then it might be harder to get a job in a public school, should I ever decide to do that. And I’d still rather be a jack of several trades than a master of one.
• Negative people are in abundance in the theatre world, but some of my closest friends were made through theatre. Also, if I hadn’t been working in theatre for the last several years, I wouldn’t have met Lauren. (And I wouldn’t have had the acting skills to trick her into marrying me!!!)
• Less acting work = more directing/music directing work = more money.

And just to be extra positive, here are some more positive theatrical thoughts:

• I just spent a week teaching musical theatre classes to junior high and high school aged students, and I loved every minute of it. And the growth of some of the kids shocked me. THAT’S why I teach. There’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a student gain confidence from “getting it”.
• I can now say that when Chris Clark turned down a directing gig, I was 2nd choice. :) And his own recommended successor. If you know how much I admire him, you’ll know how much that means to me.
• Every time I see any version of Hamlet, I remember how brilliant the script is, how much I love it, and the fact that 400+ year old stories can be made as pertinent and fresh today as they were when they were written.
• I figured out how to use a feature in my recording software today that will make my tracks SO much better. I’m excited to get some recording done next week now.

That’s it for now. I’m going to fall asleep to the fifth act of The Royal Shakespeare Company’s Hamlet, starring David Tennant. Thanks for reading!

Current (and Not-So-Current) Peeves

I opened Windows Live Writer to blog for the first time in months, and I found this unpublished post from a LONG time ago. I’m going to just add to the end.

• People who are REALLY nice to somebody’s face, to the point of making them believe that they’re good friends, and then say awful things behind their backs: this is why I don’t go out of my way to be nice to people.
• Students with smart mouths who are dishonest in order to cover their tracks
• People who cause Lauren stress
• People who try to tell Lauren how to do wedding stuff
• People who make a huge deal about how they expect a wedding invite, but don’t give you their address and won’t respond to a Facebook message requesting it
• OOH! People who finally respond when you send them a text asking for their address, who then slam the fact that your message over Facebook wasn’t “special” enough
• People who offer to help with wedding stuff and then either back out or sit and complain/whine the whole time they’re helping
• People who don’t say “please” or “thank you”
• People who CONSTANTLY expect people to do things for them
• One-way friendships
• People who respond to texts/voicemails on THEIR time
• Deceased grandparents who insist on haunting me – I’m already being followed by Eleanor
• The lack of communication between the rest of the faculty/administration at my school and me
• People who insist on turning right from the middle of the street – WHEN THERE’S A RIGHT TURN LANE

Some things are current peeves still/again. And now the new stuff:

• Watching Will & Grace reruns and remembering how much I was irritated by Woody Harrelson’s guest arc
• Girls that are less than a year away from turning 30 who act like they’re 13
• Said girls treating Lauren like dirt
• Having to wear long pants every day to school
• Feeling like I have to babysit techies
• The weather (don’t tell me that Utah is always this weird in April. It’s not. It CAN be, but it’s not ALWAYS this bad)
• Never having/making time to blog
• Never having/making time to write my missionary brother-in-law
• Finally making time to write a blog, and getting so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open

January

So, apparently, there was this whole month that went by, and I was so busy that I barely noticed it. Oops!

Then I started writing a blog about the missing month, and didn’t finish for more than half another month. Double oops!

The New Year rang in with a fireworks display inside a snow bank at the Varney house. It was pretty fun. Especially when I lit a giant fountain that started spraying sparks toward all the spectators.

We didn’t really have time to breathe before we jumped back into every day rehearsals for Disco Inferno. Have you ever opened a show, sat back and thought “Well, it’s fun, I guess. And I got a paycheck.” That was Disco Inferno. It was a TERRIBLE script, and the experience of working on it wasn’t much better, due to some special people who continually act like they’re in high school theatre.

As soon as DI opened, I was in rehearsals for Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, which is going to be a fantastic show. Brilliant direction, perfect cast, great source material. I’m excited.

I also jumped back into rehearsals for Urinetown, which was incredible. Even though I got left out of the program, meaning I got NO credit for the music direction, I was still very proud of the show and especially the cast. Despite a crew member who seemed Hellbent on destroying everyone’s morale all the time, they really pulled it off.

My birthday happened, and I spent the whole day in rehearsals and then I had to go to the school masquerade ball. My department was in charge, so my classes provided entertainment. The theme was comics, so we did a number from You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown and a dance to “Spider-Pig.” Lauren came after Disco was over, and she dressed as Batgirl. I was Charlie Brown in his Halloween costume. We were pretty much the only adults who dressed up. LAME. Some of my friends forgot my birthday, too, and hardly anybody gave me presents. This gives me hope, however, that nobody will make a big deal out of my “milestone” birthday next year.

The week after my birthday, I took 25 students to UTA at UVU. While they had fun going to classes, I had fun catching up with old friends. Maybe I also had fun doing stupid dares by doing things like carrying a mannequin by the crotch through a room of high school students.

That’s about it for January. February is almost over now, too, so I should probably start writing a blog about it. Someday…

2009 in Review

Last year I posted a 2008 in Review blog and said that I was going to try to make it an annual occurrence. Well, it now officially is, except I accidentally published this one over the old one. Guh! Oh, well. Out with the old, in with the new, I suppose…

Best Overall Experience: Dating & Marrying Lauren
Gosh, I love that girl. I can’t believe that we got this far without her being freaked out by me and running. Also, we’ve gotten this far without ever having an actual fight (unless you count play-fights, which I don’t.) She doesn’t feel the need to change who she is for me, and she doesn’t expect me to change who I am for her. She can take care of herself, but she lets me do what I can to take care of her. She’s slowly converting to all my loves (Saved by the Bell, horror movies, Friends, Buffy, etc.). Best of all, she loves me at least half as much as I love her.

Favorite Personal Theatrical Experiences: Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Chess, Little Shop of Horrors
I loved my staff of Joseph, and despite all of the crap that happened with the cast, it was an amazing, rewarding experience to see my vision end up on stage. Chess wasn’t the greatest show I’ve ever worked on, but it was such an incredible personal experience, and I loved almost every single cast member. Also, I have a major man crush on Dave Tinney, and he’s one of the best directors I’ve ever worked with. This also leads to Little Shop. Other than one obnoxious person, I DID love the entire cast. And Dave and the Hales/Swensons were fantastic to work with. Also, the quality of the show was outstanding.

Runners-Up: The Monkey’s Paw

Least Favorite Personal Theatrical Experiences: Stellaluna, Shakespeare Competition
Stellaluna was a nightmare. The music was TERRIBLE. The cast tried their best, but it was just ugly music. Also, the director seemed to not have any organizational skills (and one director left halfway through the process) and my time was wasted a lot. Then, they didn’t get into runs, so I never got to go and actually help polish the music. I orchestrated the music, though, and I made it tolerable (to myself, at least). Getting my kids ready for Shakespeare was ridiculous. They were not committed, not focused, and many of them were just plain lazy. Then to go to the competition and have the kids not get a single award was pretty stinky, although when we calculated rehearsal hours, it was obvious why they didn’t. Blargh.

Runners-Up: None.

Favorite Local Theatre Productions: Singin’ in the Rain (HCTO), As You Like It (HCTO)
I hate Singin’. HATE. But they did a fantastic job with it. Music aside (which I arranged/orchestrated and even composed some), AYLI was FANTASTIC. I was able to see both casts, and it was really tough trying to choose a favorite cast. Each actor was very well cast. Chris Clark is a freaking genius. Even people I know who usually don’t “get” Shakespeare seemed to enjoy themselves. Except for the horrendously fat people next to Teri and me, who left at intermission. Not that we complained.

Runners-Up: None.

Favorite Professional Theatre Productions: White Christmas, In the Heights (Both Broadway)
I never really cared for the movie of White Christmas, but I had heard that the Broadway version had been fixed up and made more “Christmassy.” I had to find out. It was true, and it was incredible. It had the feel of a golden age musical, but a modern feel to the pace (not unlike the current Broadway production of South Pacific). The cast was amazing, the choreography was stunning, the sets were to-die-for, and the tech was fantastic. Loved every aspect. In the Heights was almost as good the second time. Most of the leads were the originals, with the exceptions of Usnavi, Vanessa, Piragua Guy, Graffiti Pete, and Kevin (who was SO much better than the original). I would have probably been completely consumed by the story, had it not been for the fact that the audience was less classy than before, and people talked and shuffled throughout.

Runners-Up: None.

Least Favorite Professional Theatre Production: Aida (Tuacahn)
I don’t even want to talk about it because of the post-traumatic stress. It was so much about the spectacle that I forgot there was a small story. The stage-flooding was ridiculous. The camel was just silly. Of the leads, the only one who was consistently on pitch was Aida, and the others were so far off sometimes that it was pathetic. I was embarrassed for the cast, and as my first show at Tuacahn, it left me unimpressed with the company.

Runners-Up: None.

Favorite Movies: Drag Me To Hell, Up, Star Trek
Drag Me was the return of classic Sam Raimi, and I loved every second. Up made me cry, multiple times. It was an incredible story with very relatable characters. Star Trek was the first time I’ve ever not only just enjoyed a Star Trek movie, but loved it.

Runners-Up: Paranormal Activity (Until the ending), Michael Jackson’s This Is It, Disney’s A Christmas Carol

Least Favorite Movie: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
SO terrible. Even though it was the first movie Lauren and I saw as a couple. It gave me one of the worst headaches of my life.

Runners-Up: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Paranormal Activity (Because of the ending)

Favorite Movie-Going Experience: Toy Story & Toy Story 2 in 3-D
Lauren and I had the entire theater to ourselves for the latter, and it was a really nice change of pace.

Runners-Up: Disney’s A Christmas Carol with the Varneys (Do families REALLY all go to movies together?!), GI Joe with Phil & Nick

Least Favorite Movie-Going Experience: None.

Strangely enough, nothing was TOO bad this year.

Runner-Up: None.

Favorite New TV Shows: Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel, Community
Neither of the first two was actually on TV new this year, but I watched them both in less than 6 months, and they were fantastic. Community is fast-becoming as clever as the first few seasons of The Office. I love the characters, I love the situations, and I love the humor. I haven’t really started watching any other new shows this year (which is good), although I really wanted to watch V. I’ll catch it on DVD.

Runner-Up: Parks and Recreation, Glee

Least Favorite New TV Show: Accidentally on Purpose
I tried to get into it because my friend Rachel sings on it, apparently. After a few episodes, I didn’t hear/see Rachel, and I wanted to die over how stupid it was.

Runners-Up: Glee (so hit and miss that sometimes it’s a favorite, sometimes I despise it)

Favorite SNL Sketches: “Say Anything,” “Digital Short: Doogie Howser Theme”
Loved them.

Runner-Up: “what up with that?” with Mindy Kaling as the guest. Her expressions were priceless.

Favorite Albums: Kelly Clarkson’s All I Ever Wanted, The Fray’s The Fray, OneRepublic’s Waking Up, Mat Kearney’s City of Black & White
Even though I don’t love Kelly much anymore, her album was my favorite of the year. It was perfect, except for one song (you know, Matt). I had it on repeat for WEEKS, and it got me through student teaching. The Fray was fantastic. Nothing new, but it was more of the classic Fray sound I love. Same with OneRepublic. Nothing too different (except maybe the children’s choir), but I loved it. Ryan Tedder is a brilliant producer, no matter what Kelly says. Mat’s newest was fantastic, too.

Runners-Up: Rodney Carrington’s Make It Christmas, Jack’s Mannequin’s The Glass Passenger (new to me), Vedera’s The Weight of an Empty Room (also new to me)

Least Favorite Album: None.
I didn’t purchase any this year that I didn’t like.

Runners-Up: None.

Favorite Trips: Southern California with family, New York honeymoon 
Everyone got along fairly well for once (other than one person, who I “kindly” chastised a couple times) and despite Glenn’s car getting burglarized, and the fact that the San Diego Zoo is boring when you’re not an animal lover, a good time was had by all. New York was great, for many reasons. Most of which, I won’t share, due to the fact I’m a gentleman.

Runners-Up: None.

Least Favorite Trip: St. George/Las Vegas with family
All we did was shop. I DID get some fantastic hats, though.

Runners-Up: None.

Favorite Class: Student Teaching
Yes, it counted as a class. Yes, I complained while it was happening. However, I learned SO MUCH, and I’ve bumped into some of the kids since I finished, and I DID make a difference in their lives.

Runner-Up: None.

Least Favorite Class: Classroom Management II
Remember the education professor that I NEVER liked? Yeah. He taught it. Enough said.

Runners-Up: None! I only had two this year!

Best Concerts: The Fray & Jack’s Mannequin, The Killers, Mat Kearney & Vedera
The first was amazing because of the music, the second had great spectacle (which fit the music), and the third was the first intimate club-setting I’ve ever attended (also, probably the last).

Runners-Up: Jim Brickman, Rascal Flatts

Worst Concerts: Kelly Clarkson, Lonestar

Kelly sang a short set, and the experience itself was miserable. Lonestar just wasn’t the same without Richie as the lead singer.

 

Here’s to an incredible 2010!!!

Random Thoughts on a Thursday Afternoon

*I started writing this on an actual Thursday afternoon. November 19, to be exact. Then, for some reason, I didn’t finish it or post it. When my brother was complaining on Facebook that he doesn’t have anything to do while he’s supposed to be working because I don’t post as much lately, I decided to throw him a bone.*

I need to finish grading some quizzes, but I KNOW that I won’t be able to get them all done before I have to leave, so I’m not going to do them now.

As I’ve been working today, I’ve been watching last night’s Glee. I’m so torn on this show. I started out loving it, but lately, it’s getting more and more lame. Last week’s episode was great, because the subject of special needs kids is something I’m passionate about. This week’s SUCKED, though. The only thing that keeps me coming back to the show is the creative way they use music, but I’m so sick of the over-processed computer voices that I can’t handle it much longer.

My kids in school have stepped it up lately. They’re finally getting it. Also, some of the kids I can’t stand are transferring out of my class next term. WOOT!

Ew. Glee is using emotional manipulation.

We went and saw This Is It the other day, and I’m more of a Michael Jackson fan than ever before. I kind of wish that he would have lived and come to Salt Lake on his tour. NOT a fan of the new “Thriller” segment he was going to use, though. Gag.

I’m getting married in exactly one month. That means we can get our marriage license any time now. It also means I need to hurry and get the announcements to the printer this weekend so they can be mailed next week.

Today is my last day of class until the Monday after Thanksgiving. WOOFREAKINHOO!!!!! I’m going to be SO productive. I’m going to record a show, do a bunch of wedding stuff, start moving into the apartment, clean my car, and try to do as much Christmas shopping as possible to get that out of the way.

The other night at Urinetown rehearsal, I was in the middle of conducting a song, and suddenly, I saw a metal folding chair move a few inches in the middle of the room. I looked around, and NOBODY was looking but me. They all had their faces buried in their music. I was very startled.

The next night, at Disco Inferno rehearsal, Eleanor (the SCERA’s ghost), threw my watch off the piano. It was sitting about 8 inches in from the left side, and suddenly it flew off and landed just left of the piano. CREEPY. People saw that one, though.

I love lighthouses. The real deal. Not decorations. The actual towers. Every time I’m on the coast, I want to visit at least one.

I just sneezed and pulled a muscle in my arm. UGH. Getting old stinks.

***

That was where I left off in the original. Here are more random thoughts, at nearly 2 AM on a Wednesday morning.

I really wish I had a better sleeping schedule. Right now, I really wish I was asleep, but lately I’ve been up working every night until at least this time, so my body does not want to sleep right now.

I didn’t get to half of my to-do list for Thanksgiving break. Don’t get me wrong- I got a TON of stuff done. Just not as much as I had hoped.

I don’t know how people collected addresses for invitations before Facebook existed.

It’s really hard trying to decide who to invite to your wedding reception. I wish I didn’t know as many people and have as many friends. If you had told me in high school that in 10 years I’d be saying that, I would have laughed at you.

The printer couldn’t get the invites done any earlier than tomorrow (EEK!), and this causes stress. We’ll be hand-delivering as many as we can this week to make sure people can get them and have two weeks notice for the reception. And that’s IF they’re ready tomorrow, and not Thursday, as the printer guaranteed would be the latest.

One last invite related thought – today, while I was being uber-productive, I was catching up on SNL episodes and saw a commercial for Blue Boutique. Pretty darn sure the font they used for everything was the same font as our invites. UGH.

Also while I was being productive tonight, I watched The Brothers Bloom. What a lame movie. I usually like independent movies, but this one stunk (despite a great cast). However, there was one exchange that made me laugh really hard, and almost made the movie worthwhile:

Penelope Stamp: [drunk] I think you're constipated.
Bloom: Constipated?
Penelope Stamp: Yeah. You're constipated. In your ******* soul. I think there is a great, humongous wad of poop up your soul's ***.

I know it’s pretty juvenile, but man, I laughed.

I never really liked the movie Major League. However, I LOVE Major League II. Especially the character of Rube.

I cleaned out all of my financial records for the last 10 years, and I now have a basket full of papers waiting to be shredded. This will go well with the shopping bag full of check stubs and receipts that are waiting to be shredded from when I cleaned those out last year.

Oh! I think I’m finally tired enough to go to bed. Going now.

(Happy, Glenn?! :P)

Higher (and Lower) Education

I wrote this blog RIGHT after graduation, but for some reason I didn’t post it. So, almost a month later (wow! time flies), here it is.

***********

In my blog about graduation, I talked all about how much I hated most of my classes when I first went to UVSC. When I went back, my experience was MUCH better. This entry is a tribute to the highs and lows of the last three years. I’ll go into great detail with praise, but on the bad stuff, don’t expect to get names. I’ll dish dirt, but not THAT much.

Best Professor (Generals): Ben Moulton. I had him for my FIRST class when I went back to school. A math class that I was “placed” in from my computer testing score. I should have been placed in a higher math class, because I had an A+ throughout the entire semester. Ben made me remember how much I loved algebra (yes, I love algebra). He also helped all of the haters do well in class. He wrote songs about formulas and equations, he found real-life applications, and he provided several ways for people to relate to math. I planned my next semester around having my next math class from him.

Worst Professor (Generals): In the last 3 years, I didn’t have many bad ones. If I could tell one was going to be bad, I transferred. Of the ones I kept, the one I liked the least was probably the history teacher who was retiring, so he didn’t really care anymore and just rambled a lot and strayed off topic too much. I’m sure he was a great professor in his day, but he was worn-out by the time I got him.

Best Professor (Theatre): Ugh. SO hard to choose. I can only narrow it down to two, so Chris Clark and Dave Tinney tie. Both men were so knowledgeable about their subjects that it was kind of disgusting. I can’t think of a time that there was a question they couldn’t answer. The real clincher, though, which made them beat out their competition, was the way they cared for and respected their students – even the obnoxious ones. In the three years I was in the program, I never once saw either man disrespect a student. They’re probably the only professors I had who I can say that about. Some of my professors seemed to think that I was stupid and incompetent, and both of them treated me exactly the opposite. In fact, Dave wrote in an e-mail to me once when I was bugged by how some of the faculty had been acting towards me, “You are NEVER a lowly student.” I hope I get to work with both of them outside of school many times in the future.

Worst Professor (Theatre): I can’t list one, because it’s too specialized, and you’d know exactly who I was talking about if I listed it. Hmm… maybe the secret blog?

Best Professor (Education): Kristen Wright. I took her Exceptional Students course, and loved every minute of it. I feel sorry for people who had other professors. Kristen was dyslexic as a child, so she teaches from the point of view of someone who has been there. She knew the subject inside out, and she provided SO much more information than a textbook ever could (or did).

Worst Professor (Education): THREEWAY TIE! First, the jerk who gave Laura perfect scores on the same work that he gave me C’s. He was out to get me the whole time, and I had THREE classes from him. Second, the guy who didn’t really know what he was doing, and he made me redo assignments because he hadn’t looked at them when I turned them in. After stressing about it, I resubmitted, and he told me I probably didn’t need to go to the work. Third, the old man who I was afraid was going to fall over. He was so old and shaky that I couldn’t read his handwriting, and he docked me points for not using APA style, even though my papers were perfect APA style. Jerk.

Best Class (Generals): Gonna have to go with Ben’s math 1010. Loved that class. Miss that class. Would take it over again.

Worst Class (Generals): English 2010. Yuck. So glad I never have to go through that again.

Best Class (Theatre): Another tough one, another tie. Acting II from Chris and Acting for Musical Theatre from Dave. I felt more growth not only as a performer, but also as a person in these classes than any others. I got HUGE confidence boosts that I really needed at those points in time. I also liked almost every other student in the classes, and for a picky butt like me, that’s really good.

Worst Class (Theatre): Introduction to Theatre. Blech! I should have been allowed to test out of it.

Best Class (Education): I don’t really have one. I liked Multicultural Instruction, Exceptional Students, Instructional Technology, and Content Area Reading & Writing. All of these classes dealt with topics I’ll actually use. They also had a minimum of busy work.

Worst Class (Education): Curriculum and Assessment, Educational Psychology, Foundations of American Education. All three included WAY too much busy work, and I didn’t care for the professors I had, either.

Most Mind-Blowing Class: Katie Farmer’s Script & Text Analysis. I struggled with her as a director, but I liked her as a teacher. She is one of the most brilliant people I’ve ever known, and her methods of analysis are accurate and ground-breaking. I can’t believe UVU is the only place that benefits from her methods. I hope she finally gets around to publishing her stuff, because I want to teach it to my own students.

Least Mind-Blowing Class: Production Practicum. Death to this “class.”

Best Production Experience: Chess. You probably either loved it or hated it, or you didn’t see it. I loved almost every second of working on this. Out of all the shows I did at school, this was the only one that didn’t make me feel relief when it ended. I was kind of bummed that it didn’t get extended at all. The Tempest is a close 2nd, and might have edged out Chess if I hadn’t been feeling burn-out already when I worked on it.

Worst Production Experience: At one point, I declared Ah, Wilderness! as the clear winner. Now, I can’t decide between it and Oh, Pioneers! The worst thing about AW was that I felt absolutely worthless. I’ve never had a director ignore me like that, and I’ve never gotten so depressed working as an actor. The worst thing about OP is that it went on FOREVER. Other things I disliked about the shows: clashing with directors (even though I love them as professors and maintain positive relationships with them OUTSIDE of the shows), dealing with cast members and/or crew members from Hell, and the overall stress they caused. Watch out, though, AW and OP! An Evening with Jason Robert Brown is a VERY close 2nd.

Best Experiences with Fellow Students: I have a few of these. Working on Dinner for Four with Trisha Nozumi, Amos Omer, and Katy Baxter. It didn’t feel at all like work, and the good times helped the quality. Also working on my scene from The Monkey’s Paw with Jana Grass and Wes Tolman. Such talented actors, and they had fun experimenting with the concept. Finally, anything to do with my good friend, Laura Garner. We hit it off immediately the first semester of our first year back, while we were working on Nunsense. We had most of our classes together from then on, and we were able to study together all the time. We also had good laughs, such as when BFF 4evr, Sara, and I convinced Laura that Shakespeare talked about how Lady Macbeth had her husband’s balls in her purse. Laura frantically searched the text for at least 5 minutes trying to find the passage. God bless you, Madame Valedictorian! Oh! Also, the trip to NYC! That counts as school since it was through the department, and it included several of my favorite fellow students.

Worst Experiences with Fellow Students: #1) When I was directing a show as a TAG benefit, and a member of TAG told me I had to do what he/she said because, and I quote, “there are five of us and one of you.” It was poetic justice when the department chair told him/her to his/her face that he/she couldn’t pull off the show, but I could. Then, he/she supposedly tried to sabotage the show by talking crap about it to others. I don’t know how valid this is, but based on how he/she acted when he/she house managed a performance, I believe it. #2) Dealing with a certain student who was constantly making others feel like crap. I don’t care if you were married to Marie Osmond, do not disrespect me or my friends. Oh, oops! Did that make it obvious who I was talking about? I’m so passive-aggressive.

Best In-Class Assignments: I really enjoyed most of the projects in Stagecraft II. Steve Purdy is a painting genius, and it was fun to work on projects with him. I think I liked the 5-board bench best of all. The stinking thing really looks like it was made of marble!

Worst In-Class Assignments: All of the busywork in my education classes. Having to write extra papers in Theatre History & Literature because the professor got cranky a couple times at people who weren’t doing their work.

Best Acting Scene: Overall, the best scene I was part of was probably when Laura and I did the climax of Doubt in Acting II. We both grew a lot, and when we performed it for an audience, we got several compliments about how people could really feel the tension (in a good way). A close runner-up would probably be the scene from Lysistrata that I did with Jaclyn Hales in Acting Styles. We had a lot of fun with that, and I felt like we got the Greek style down pretty well.

Worst Acting Scene: In Acting I, I did a scene from The Importance of Being Earnest with a really nice guy who was NOT an actor. I think he was a technology student. I could have gotten more out of a piece of cardboard. Luckily, Chris was nice when it came grading time.

Most Fun Acting Scene: Tie between Tartuffe with Sara Preston and Mark Oram in Acting Styles and the commedia scene for the same class, with Sara and Laura. In one, I got to hide under a table while my wife tried to seduce a man. In the other, we got to rewrite the Bible – commedia del’arte style. Good times.

Least Fun Acting Scene: I love Mandy Lyons to death, and our scene from Angels in America turned out to be pretty darn good (Chris told me it was my best performance all semester). However, it was NOT fun to work on. What a downer! We couldn’t go through it too many times because it got so emotional.

Other moments I want to remember:

• Working on a scene with Elfi as a crooked doctor and me as a crooked businessman
• Telling Laura via MSN during class that Kyla had the look on her face that she gets when she’s gassy, and having Kyla coincidentally pull the WEIRDEST face right as Laura looked. All three of us laughed. We got in trouble.
• WTF?! moments during Chess where Dave and I would try not to laugh and would pass notes to each other.
• Discussing the brilliance of The Office, Pushing Daisies, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Firefly, and more with Joe Fox while working in the shop. Sometimes Steve joined us.
• The one time I actually went to KCACTF, and it wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be. Saw some good theatre, saw some BAD theatre (Little Shop of Symbolic Female Genitals, anyone?), attended some good workshops, attended some BAD workshops. However, I had fun hanging out with friends, and it helped to solidify my desire to teach theatre. And I met Mrs. Joe!
• Being asked to perform two scenes at a showcase night. Granted, some people performed a lot more, but for someone who at that point had no confidence in their acting skills, that was big.
• Being told by James Arrington after AW that he really believed I was a guy out looking for a prostitute. Pretty sure it was a compliment, but it was a little too Three Men and a Little Lady for my taste.
• Doing sound design for Canyon Suite and totally pulling my concept out of thin air when I was trying to convince Dr. Petrie to not make me do his idea. I loved the idea I came up with, and it was executed pretty well.
• Being chosen as the Theatre Department’s Student of the Year.
• Being asked to be on the season selection committee my junior year and having a say in what we did during my senior year. Too bad the season got completely messed up after the plans for the new theatre came to be.
• Analyzing The Village in Katie’s class and finding out that I’m not crazy for thinking it’s a bad movie.
• The time we dressed Joe up as a gypsy car salesman in Stagecraft I.
• Spending TONS of time working my butt off scoring Nosferatu by cutting, pasting, and deciding what clips to use and when. It was actually a blast to set up Sonar and edit the score like a Hollywood mixer. Not so much fun was having members of the cast and crew tell people that I had nothing to do with the show. I totally snapped at one person when he tried to tell my friend, Lindsay, IN FRONT OF ME that Chris did all the music. Had it not been such a miserable experience, I might have actually stayed with the show and put myself through Hell to write a complete, original score for ACTF. As it was, I passed.

I think that’s about it. I’ve blogged about school so many times that I guess I could easily go back and reminisce through them. Overall, the last 3 years of school were pretty great, with just a few bumps along the way. I already miss some of the people I saw all the time at school, and I miss classes where I can actually do scene work myself, and not be coaching kids. I miss LEARNING, too. And sadly, I miss algebra. :)

Pomp and Circumstance

It's only 11 PM, and I'm about to go and start getting ready for bed. Djyuwannaknowhy? Djyurillywannaknow?

BECAUSE I'M GRADUATING IN THE MORNING!!!

I'm going to wear something special with my gown, too. Not Flavor Flav bling. Even BETTER. And more Jeremy.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, we DID get 2 superiors and 1 excellent at State Drama, which resulted in a superior rating. The shocker: I'm pretty sure the excellent came from the first judge who hardly said anything other than the fact that he loved the show. Hmm...

Hear that, schools who won't hire me?! That's TWO plays I've directed for state, and TWO plays that have gotten superior ratings. Suck on it! Good luck with your non-accolade-winning teachers...

Happiness Is…

Downloading multiple covers of “Holiday Road.” I was looking for Lindsay Buckingham’s version, but instead found 4 completely different but equally interesting ones.

Having a good final dress rehearsal for Charlie Brown. The tech this year is already better after one day than it was after the entire week last year.

Seeing Heidi and Holly this weekend for a few minutes.

Glenn’s homemade burritos. Even though they cause HORRIBLE gas. TMI, maybe?

Dum-Dums!

Uncle Buck on DVD.

John Hughes movies in general.

Another tentative job interview is scheduled. I should be hearing back about the last one any day now.

GRADUATION IS A WEEK AND A HALF AWAY!!!

Things I've Learned This Semester

Another semester has come and gone, and therefore, it's time for another installment!

• People can be not only the normal age of college students but can be MY age and still act like they're in junior high. Starting rumors among a department in a university? SERIOUSLY?! Grow up.
• As much as I hate my education department and some of the stupid classes and awful teachers I've had to endure, I feel like I've learned how to teach better than some of the professors in the theatre department. I have one in particular who has the WORST classroom management skills I've ever seen. If he were to set foot in a high school or junior high, he'd be slaughtered.
• Disneyland can be fun with Matt and Melinda after all! You just have to pick and choose who else comes. Lindsay was a good choice.
• There are always going to be people who think they're better, smarter, and more talented than you. Chances are, if they feel this way, it's because they're terribly insecure, and if you give them some rope, they'll hang themselves.
• Apparently, my lesson plans DON'T suck. Even though one teacher keeps slamming them and giving them horrible grades (and gives Laura great grades for essentially the same plans), my other education professors are giving them good grades.
• If I ever find myself describing a show as "brilliant" or "theatrical" it will surely be cancelled. Goodbye, Pushing Daisies.
• Not only am I getting back to being confident in my acting, I'm actually enjoying it again. I took not one, but TWO acting classes this semester that were not required. I loved both of them. I also wanted to be in a show badly enough that I made my life more stressful by doing A Christmas Carol. And I've loved all of the feedback I've gotten.
• It is totally impossible for a female to ever like me as more than just a friend. Unless, of course, she is crazy bojangles. CRAZY. BO. JANGLES.
• If you put off even thinking about Christmas presents until after finals, your brain will be fried and you'll have a hard time figuring out gift ideas.
• Having an arch-nemesis is fun. Especially when they think they're the superhero and you're the villain.
• I'm never going to be able to play Rock Band as much as I want to, unless I somehow find a way to get paid to play it.
• Diet Dr. Pepper really DOES taste like regular Dr. Pepper!
• A flawless profile, a perfect body, the right clothes and a great car can get you far in America, almost to the top. But it can't get you everything.

Completely Random

I'm sitting in the most boring class of all time. ALL TIME. We're doing group presentations, and there's only so much group presentation "goodness" that you can handle in three hours. So, here are some of the thoughts running through my head today.

I'm excited for the show tonight. The Varneys are all coming, as are the Labrums, the Hutchings, and Laura. Hmm. That makes Laura sound lonely. Poor woman. It's her own fault.

Yesterday, in Acting Styles, Laura and I were doing an exercise by either Stanislavski or Meisner. I can't remember which one. Anyway, you bring up some kind of personal issue, and you talk about it by saying "Yes, that's true" or "No, that's not" and then following it up with another statement. Laura, being the horndog that she is (did I mention she met President Monson last night and shook his hand?), started talking about my fantasies, and I said that the only fantasy I have right now involves whipped cream and Thanksgiving leftovers. Elfi was listening into our exercise, and she got so embarrassed that I thought she was going to choke. Her face was as red as the label on the Dr. Pepper that I'm drinking right now. It stayed that way for a couple minutes while Laura and I laughed.

I'm also using this boring time to search for sound effects for my design of Dancing at Lughnasa. It's for a class, so it's not an actual production, but I'm still having fun. It's a great challenge to design a show you hate and make yourself like it because of your design. I have a fun concept involving the radio of the show. It's similar to what I did with Canyon Suite, but to a further extreme.

I'm really excited for Chess, and even more excited that I'm not going to have any shows to stress about next semester other than Charlie Brown. I'm a little sad, because I wish I had something else, but I know that I'll be needing more time to work on lesson plans and stuff.

Power Points are fun, but let's not put EVERYTHING on them and then read verbatim.

I bound my score for Charlie Brown yesterday, and I like the cover I came up with for it. Even more, I like the fact that I made it in less than 10 minutes.

I'm really annoyed that these presentations are supposed to last about an hour, and the first group today took almost two, so this one is all stressed trying to get their presentation done in time.

*****

Class ended yesterday, and I didn't get to finish this post. But now, I'm in the oh-so-exciting "show and tell" day in Lighting and Sound Design class. We're all sharing sounds that we've found for Dancing at Lughnasa. It's boring. So, here are some more random thoughts.

As egotistical as it seems, I'm keeping track of some of the compliments I'm getting for A Christmas Carol. I justify this for two reasons. 1) Because if you follow my blog, you know how much I've needed it in the past. 2) Because I use the blog as my journal, and you know what? You probably write down nice things that people say about you in your journal. Don't deny it.

Last night, I bumped into Bobby Swenson at the theatre. He is the grandson of the original Hales. He's great. Anyway, I said hi to him and then was going to go and get ready, and then he told me that he really knows the show (he must have seen it every year of his life or something...) and he really likes my rendition of Fred. I told him thank you, and he told me again how much he like what I was doing with the part.

Also, last week, the assistant director/production manager/whatever they call him came up to me and said something to the effect of "You're a great music director, but I hope you don't stop acting." Wow. Suck on THAT, [director/producer who told me I needed to not act and focus on music directing]!!!

The other night, the guy who plays Bob Cratchit in the other cast was performing with us. He basically told me that his wife said she had never liked the opening scene with Fred and Scrooge until she saw me. Woohoo! I want to meet her so I can thank her.

Sometimes, all I need in my life is a good conversation with Julie and Trash Ball for a couple hours. They're fun.

Matt and Melinda are coming to the show tomorrow night. Last time I was in this show, they came to see it and Melinda ate corn beforehand. Melinda is allergic to corn and has major reactions to it. As a result, she was miserable and sick during the show, and they had to leave in the middle. Therefore, she is NOT allowed to eat corn tomorrow. No corn at all.

I had a ton of people at the show last night that came to see me. It was very nice. Happy fun time!

I think I'm going to Twelfth Night tonight. I'd rather have a night to just not do anything and relax. Oh, well. After next week, I can find a few nights here and there, I hope.

I'm SO done with school. D. O. N. E. Next week, I have song to perform in Musical Theatre ("My Freeze Ray" from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog), a scene to perform in Acting Styles (An Ideal Husband), and a presentation in Content Area Reading and Writing. Then, the next week, I have finals which consist of performing 3 of the scenes I've done in Acting Styles, performing two of the songs I've done in Musical Theatre, and turning in my final sound design. Then, school is over. I'll actually be able to do some Christmas shopping and stuff.

This class is over, but I don't have time to publish this, so I'll come back later...

*****

Last time I edit before publishing, I swear...

Emily and I just got back from Twelfth Night. I wanted to like it so much more. I sure did love Katy and Sara, though.

I'm done with random thoughts for now, I think. I'm going to finish watching The Soup, play Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe for a minute (have I mentioned how much I love that game?!), and then head to bed. I have a crazy day tomorrow full of rehearsals, meetings, and performances.

Goodnight!

(PS to Julie G. - I made a special tag for you. I hope you know that shows just how strong our friendship is. I just might add you to MY blogroll!)

Total Randomness

I've forgotten how much I love Nicole Kidman. I'm so glad Tom Cruise left her. She deserves better. I'm not a huge fan of Keith Urban, but he DID give her an adorable baby, so I guess that's worth something. I think I could probably break them up so I could have her, though. I'm also getting REALLY excited for Australia.

I'm completely over the election. It was a week ago. Can we drop it now? I'm tired of seeing people I care about getting in other people's faces over their beliefs. Especially when it's something like "You're so close-minded and stupid for voting that way, let me show you why my way was THE right way." Seriously? SERIOUSLY! You really think that refusing to see any validity in anyone else's beliefs is defined as open-mindedness?

I just saw Aida at the Hale (Thanks, Em!) and was blown away. If you haven't seen it yet, GO!

I'm putting together playlists for my trip to Disneyland later this week. I'm going with Matt, Melinda, and Lindsay. Each one of us picked one of our favorite songs of all time, and I'm creating playlists around each song through iTunes' Genius feature. We also picked a song for each of the others that reminds us of them. Some of these playlists have turned out AWESOME, and some hysterical. It should be fun to listen to them and first of all have to figure out which song is the significant one in each playlist, and then who chose it and who it represents. Of course I know everything (what's new? HA!) but it'll still be fun to have everyone else guessing.

Did I mention that I'm going to Disneyland this week? Hopefully, it will be a better trip than my last two Disneyland trips. Please bless that Lindsay, Melinda, and Matt will not turn into psychos while we're there. If I suffer through another Disneyland trauma, it might finally ruin the place.

I want to be Baz Luhrmann when I grow up.

I can't focus on school this week. This is bad.

I finally got my student teaching assignment, and it's starting to sink in that I'm FINALLY going to be done with school.

I'm a little stoked for Christmas Carol. Say what you will about it, but I love it. It's not the greatest piece of theatre ever, but it's got such a great spirit to it, and it's so fun to take part in it. Diane (who I respect and love a great deal) told me the other day that she loves how I portray the role of Fred and that I "get it." Shortly after, Jerry, the director, pulled me aside and said pretty much the same thing. Emily says things like that sometimes, too, and probably not just because she has to as my wife. Compared to my last acting experience, this is basically heaven. I'm not questioning my abilities and choices on a regular basis.

Heather and David are coming home for Christmas! They've already contacted me to let me know that they want to come to Christmas Carol. God bless them, every one.

Matt showed me this video the other day, and I about died. I agree with what it's saying, but couldn't there be a better way to show it? Or at least some decent actresses?

I'm Carol!!!

As many of you should know, I auditioned for A Christmas Carol at the Hale Center Theater in Orem last week. I haven't been in a play (that I claim) since the last time I did CC in 2005. That was the year when I played Fred (the role I had always wanted) and my good friend Trash didn't get cast at all. We were really sad because we wanted to play husband and wife. Don't feel bad for Trash, though. She got a Batman trick-or-treat pail out of it. And she's a Trash Ball.

The next two years, I was so busy with school stuff (Nunsense, Tempest, Ha Wilderness, Canyon Suite) that I was unable to do the show again. It was nice the first year to have a Christmas without worrying about a show, but last year, Trash played Mrs. Fred again, and I was a teeny bit jealous.

Months ago, I decided that if there was any chance my schedule would allow it, I would audition this year. Since my work for Nosferatu is pretty much done, and the bulk of my work for Chess will be done soon, I figured it was a good time. So, I auditioned.

And may I just tell you that I ROCKED that audition? I was going to just sing "Unworthy of Your Love" from Assassins, because that's what I had just finished working on in musical theatre class. However, I didn't know who the pianist was going to be, and it is a little tricky to play. At 1 AM the morning of the audition, I changed to "When She Loved Me" from Toy Story 2, which is sung by a man in On the Record (and much better, I feel). I had a practice track, so I went through it a few times throughout the day.

My audition time was at the same time as my friend Heidi's, so we got there together and went in. The auditions were running an hour behind, so we got to sit in the crowded hallway and wait patiently for a long time. When I finally got in there, I found out it was a good pianist, so I didn't need to worry afterall. I went ahead and did "When She Loved Me" and focused on the words so much that I didn't act it quite as well as I would have liked. However, I felt REALLY good about it. Then I read Fred's monologue about profit from Christmas (which President Monson has quoted before) and it was easy, since I had it memorized 3 years ago.

After a night and morning that crept by, I got a phone call inviting me to callbacks the next night. Trash got called back, too, so we planned to go in together and show them how fun we are and how much chemistry we would have on stage. (I'm convinced that the reason I got the part in 2005 was because Crocky and I had so much fun together when we read.)

The callbacks were done completely randomly, and Trash and I never read together. We were totally bummed. I was also called back for Topper, so I had to read that as well. The women were excused, and those of us who were up for Fred stayed to read the scene where Fred tries to get Scrooge to come to dinner. I freaking rocked it. I know some people have a warped sense of how good they really are, but looking at my scene as a director, I was blown away. I was the ONLY guy there who had any levels and didn't just stay the same the whole scene. That was Friday night.

Saturday morning, some people were already finding out that they had been cast. I was bummed. Trash found out that afternoon that she was cast, but didn't know her part (although, we really suspected it was Mrs. Fred). By Saturday night, I still hadn't heard anything. I was a little bummed, but I still felt pretty good.

Sunday night, I got the call. Trash Ball and I were officially man and wife. So, we did the most natural step. We changed our Facebook status to show that we were hitched. Several people have congratulated me on the wedding, some have been offended that they weren't invited, and some have caught the joke.

In case you were wondering, here is a rundown of the actual wedding festivities.

Friday night, we prepared by going to Smith's and buying Coke and pumpkin-shaped sugar cookies with orange sprinkles. Then, the actual ceremony, or callbacks, happened.

Afterward, we spent a lovely wedding dinner at Mimi's Cafe with our good friend, Matt. Trash was a little cranky to be spending time with another man while we should have been honeymooning, and she snapped at Matt and scared the waitress at one point.

Saturday, we spent our honeymoon seeing a play, Dial 'M' for Murder at BYU. It wasn't very good. Some of the actors were downright great, but a couple were pretty bad. And the director was under the impression that it was a comedy, when in fact, it's a dark drama with a few little jokes here and there. It was supposedly film noir style, but nothing about it said film noir. And the music....EW. There was modern music with synth sounds mixed with old stuff that was accurate. Hated that part the most.

After the play, we were fortunate enough to spend our second night as man and wife at dinner with the Culps and their families. Have I ever mentioned how much I love the Culps? Well, I love them a whole lot. They're loads of fun.

Sunday, we went to our respective wards (at least Trash Ball BETTER have) and then I finished Nosferatu. Oh, and then that night we found out were were married.

Overall, it was a good weekend. If you would like to send Trash and me a wedding gift, let me know, and I'll give you my address. Otherwise, just plan to come and see Christmas Carol in a month and a half.

PS - If you get the title of this blog, you win five hundred dollars. And by "five hundred dollars", I mean the privilege of knowing that I think you're cool.

Hey, It's a Happy Day!!!

My new drive came this morning, with plenty of time for me to install it before school. I quickly got to work, and before I knew it, I had a brand-spanking-new optical drive in my computer....THAT DIDN'T WORK.

I spent the whole day being ornery. Poor youth theatre kids. And it didn't help to see a show at school in the mood I was in. I really wanted to like it, I swear...

I got home tonight and got online with another HP support technician. I decided after the She-Ra fiasco, I needed to speak with printed words. Serenity was very nice, and only said a few mildly Engrish-sounding things. She (I hope) gave me some new steps to try and solve the problem, but they included rebooting at the end. I did them, and nothing.

So, I started speaking to Sunny. I was very excited at first, because I thought that maybe Sunny Watts was moonlighting as an HP online support technician. I love that woman. However, I probably wouldn't trust her with my computer.

Anyhoo, Sunny gave me steps to follow, and when I finished them- the error message was gone!!! I popped the revival recording of Chicago into the drive, and soon enough, the master of ceremonies was telling me about adultery and murder. I then popped in my DVD of Strangers on a Train, and shortly saw Hitchcock in glorious black & white.

I was giddy like a schoolboy. I thanked Sunny and actually said "God bless you!" Sunny is my new hero.

I'm still sending back the old drive, though. I figure that I earned the new one, with a little help from Sunny. And She-Ra.

Other happy thoughts tonight:

• While I was going through the endless steps to try and fix my computer, I watched Pushing Daisies and Dirty Sexy Money. The former was just as good as ever, and the latter was even better than last season. Oh, and Ghost Hunters was great, too. Very scary.
• My new favorite line ever from a primetime soap: "I'm going to take a shower and try to wash whatever's left of this marriage off my body. Try not to fall down." (She did, in fact fall down in the next scene.)
• I'm going to audition for A Christmas Carol at the Hale next week. The last time I was in a show (I'm pretending Ah, Wilderness! didn't exist) was CC of 2005, when I played Fred, which was one of my dream roles. I'm super excited this time, because *if* I get cast as that part again, I'll most likely be playing off of Trash Ball as Mrs. Fred. Cross your fingers and pray for us, please. Having a fun acting experience is EXACTLY what I need right now. I just have to hope that they want me enough to work around my few Chess conflicts.
• I'm feeling really good about my musical theatre class. Especially being someone who doesn't "sing or act very well" and should "stick to music directing." I felt really good about my preview performance on Monday- which was while my cold/allergies were bugging me and I had a queasy stomach from taking my pills on an empty stomach. Today, we did a really fun exercise to focus on breathing. Good times.
• I'm almost done buying things for my Halloween costume. It's a brilliant idea, if I do say so myself. I hope I have somewhere fun to wear it, because if it's just to stay at home and hand out candy to kids who won't even know who I am because they're too young, I'll be bugged. I put in a bid for the last main part of the costume on eBay tonight. I'll know tomorrow if I need to look elsewhere. And then I need to start constructing the tricky part...
• The semester is about 1/3 of the way over. CRAZY! And yet, awesome. The senioritis isn't so bad right now, but I expect it to kick back in eventually.
• I feel like my Facebook status right now is really clever, because it's not one, but TWO pop culture references. If you get them, you're cool. If not, you're probably Heather. ;) David will get one, though.
• Speaking of the Masons, I GOT TO TALK TO THEM TONIGHT!!! We've played phone tag for over a month, and we finally made contact tonight. Heather hasn't picked up a fake NY accent yet. Thank goodness. Although, if she started talking like one of the sweet, old, Jewish ladies that I met in Rockefeller Center 9 years ago, I wouldn't mind. It would actually make her more endearing, I think.
• My youth theatre kids are harder workers than they were last year. Granted, there are probably 30 new kids, and only about 40 of the same, but still...they're learning better, and some are learning faster. It makes it easier for me to ditch the extra rehearsals if I get cast in CC. :)
• I get to see the Culps next week! And Keisha is supposed to be in town, too. I think she may have called me earlier, but I didn't get a voicemail. I hope she calls back when I'm not in the middle of teaching.
• I have a free night tomorrow (I think). I think I'll have a Blu-Ray marathon while I work on a lighting cue list for Sty of the Blind Pig - a.k.a. the most screwed up play of all time.
• I'm going to Disneyland next month, and while I'm excited about seeing the parks all dec'd for Christmas, I'm mostly excited for the Ace of Base marathon on the car trip down. I think I actually have enough Ace of Base for the entire drive. (Bwahahahahaha!)
• Robin Thicke's new album is In. Cred. I. Ble. If you like him, or even if you don't, check it out. Seriously. So far, I haven't noticed anything too dirty, either. Of course, I didn't notice anything dirty on the last one until my sister chewed me out for listening to such a dirty CD.

And now, I'm going to bed. I have a feeling I'll be up way too early tomorrow because of stupid construction again. In the meantime, hey! It's a happy day!

Why Did You Do It, Spider-Man?

Here are some things that are on my mind right now:

• I did a scene in my acting styles class today, and I felt pretty good about it. It was with a girl who is like a star actress at school, and it was from an ancient Greek play called Lysistrata, which is about women who have a sex strike to try and get their husbands to end a war. In our scene, I thought I had finally convinced her to have sex, but she was really just messing with me, and ran away at the end. It was just a *little* bit naughty, and a whole lot of fun. We had to act it in the classical style, which is basically going against everything that I've ever been taught about acting. It was weird. I felt retarded.
• My show opened tonight. It's a good show, don't get me wrong, but I feel it could have been better, and it's partly my fault. I should have spoken up more. In the last couple weeks of rehearsal, I was only given time to give notes twice. Tonight, I was told to join the circle of the cast and crew before the show, and then the costumer was given a chance to give notes, two theater employees were given a chance to give notes, the major stage mom gave notes, and the director gave his own notes. I wasn't given a chance to speak. I had a few notes to give, and they weren't ever given, which means they probably never WILL be. I feel like my opinion didn't matter AT ALL with this show. It's a good thing that Chess has been the complete opposite so far. People used to always tell me "when you have a degree, people will take you seriously." Well, I'm 7 months away from a degree (WOOHOO!) and if it doesn't change, I may have to quit community theatre altogether. I'm tired of being made to feel like I'm an idiot with bad ideas.
• Apparently, my last blog post made it sound like I'm depressed about the fact that I'm going to be single forever. FAR from the truth. Seriously, when I said I've accepted it, and I'm okay with it, even if it means I'll be pegged as part of an old gay couple, I meant it. So, if you gave me sympathy over it, thanks, but I wasn't fishing for that. Girls are WHACK. (Said girl in last blog is talking to me again and inquiring about my schedule.)
• I got Pushing Daisies on Blu-Ray for an incredible price this week. And I'm crossing my fingers that I'll actually have time to watch it soon.
• Shannen Doherty plays a professional actress on 90210. Really?! Really, Brenda? You played Hedda Gabler? Where was this? The Springville Playhouse? Valley Center Playhouse? Apparently, in Beverly Hills, bad actresses are great actresses. Of course, AnnaLynne McCord is on the show, too, so apparently, they're fans of the bad acting.
• Did I just openly admit that I've seen the new 90210? Oops.
• Have I mentioned how excited I am about Chess lately?
• The new season of The Office starts in less than a week, and I get to watch it in HD. WOOT!
• The guy who plays Claire's dad on Heroes has one of the worst dye jobs ever. EVER. Just to clarify, I do NOT watch Heroes. I got bored with it halfway through the first season. Just so you know, when I talk about TV shows, it doesn't mean I watch them...:)
• The DVD drive on my laptop has stopped working, and it's really frustrating.
• One of my favorite new activities is taking completely wholesome songs and bleeping out random words. Then, if someone tells you that you're nasty and filthy, all you have to do is say "Wait- what did YOU fill in the bleeps with?!"
• I'm really tired, and I'm heading to bed. But first, the video that inspired my blog title. And rest assured, if I do have kids someday, I will have a two year old who can do this, too:

Pity the Jeremy

I haven't taken the time to blog for a while because I've been crazy busy (quel surprise). In case you're wondering why I've been so busy, of even if you're not, here you go:

School started. I hate it. I have the worst case of senioritis known to man. I'm down to only taking classes that I HAVE to take, which include two education classes (both deathly boring), and three theatre classes (all three of which I love so far) in order to keep my scholarship. As much as I love my theatre classes this semester, which are fun classes that aren't required for my major, I just want to be done with school. 10 years ago this very minute, I was a senior in high school. That's too bloody long to go without graduating college.

Going into fall semester, I was worried that I was going to get stuck doing the French farce. I had already agreed to do music for Nosferatu for my production hours, but didn't have anything lined up for my scholarship. Since I can read French and speak it somewhat, I figured that's what I'd be doing. The first day of school, however, I found out that the farce had been cancelled, and Chess had been moved up. I freaked out. I had wanted to be involved with Chess, but knew I couldn't because it was scheduled for April, when I'm supposed to be student teaching. Right away, I asked Dave Tinney if he was planning to MD himself or if he needed one. He seemed genuinely excited and asked if I was interested. I told him I was, and we both planned to talk to the department chair, Terry. By the time I got in to see Terry, I think Dave had already talked to him, and he said that it was a great way for me to get my scholarship hours. Woot! I was dying to do Chess, and I've been dying to actually work with Dave.

The fall auditions were held a couple weeks ago, and Dave asked me to sit in on them. I was shocked. However, the one person on the faculty that I expected to give me crap for being there did. He said he was joking, but I'm not sure he was...

Anyway, after auditions, Dave wouldn't even post a callback list without asking my opinions first. After callbacks last Monday, he went through every single person with me. It was awesome. I'm used to being respected like that at every other theatre I work for, but this is the first time at school that I've felt like an important member of a production team and not just a lowly student. We haven't had a single rehearsal yet, and I already love working with Dave.

We got the show cast, and there's already crap going around because we cast a BYU student in a lead role. Normally, I would be pissed, too, but since I sat through all the auditions, I know for a fact that no guy in our department could have sung the part. In auditions, I tested them all on "Anthem" which goes up to a G. Most of the guys struggled with the high range. For the part we cast a BYU guy, he sings up to a D above that. I can see why sometimes professors get a bad rap for casting decisions. No matter what you do, people will find a reason to be unhappy. (Including myself. *cough, Ah, Wilderness, cough*)

We don't start rehearsals for weeks, so after we got Chess cast, I started going back to Seussical rehearsals. Seussical has been a really rough show for me to do because of events that went down last time. I actually tried to get out of the show before it started because the past got dug up and I knew it would be too hard to handle. I said I would stay with the show if they could not find another MD, and after about 5 turned them down, I was back on the project. I'm actually glad I stayed with it. I've been a typical MD on this show: showed up at the beginning, taught all of the music, disappeared for a while, and then went back to polish. (Some MDs around here don't even go back after they teach it, and it makes me frustrated to no end.) The cast is much better than I feared they would be after me leaving them for a month, and it's turning out to be a really good show. I'm also dealing with rehearsals better than I thought I would, which I'm going to credit to the fact that I prayed my guts out about it when the whole process started.

That's the bulk of what's been going on. The rest of my time has been spent doing homework, teaching piano, two whole afternoons of youth theatre every week, staying up late enjoying my new HD-DVR (Psych and Mad Men in HD = Happy Jeremy), watching Psych DVDs until I fall asleep every night, and trying to have some kind of social life (translation, I've seen Teri and Kimber once, Emily and Heidi once, Matt once....I think that's about it). Oh, and of course Church stuff.

So that's it. If you don't hear from me until April, don't panic. Know that I probably love you, like you greatly, or at least tolerate you, and I'll call you as soon as I graduate.

And right now, I have to go memorize a scene that I'm performing in class tomorrow with the mask that I made this afternoon.

TTFN!

PS - The title of this blog is a reference to something, and if you get it, you rock.

Summer in Review

School starts in less than 12 hours. While I'm glad that it didn't start when Utah school districts start for the first time in ages, giving me an extra week, I'm still not excited. I should be. I have classes with all of my favorite teachers in the theatre department. Most of my classes this semester are fun classes and not required. It's my final senior year, meaning after two more semesters, I'm DONE. I should be stoked, right? But I'm not. Oh, well. Even though it was way too short, I had a GREAT summer. In honor of this, I decided to create a blog to award some moments of the summer and give them due respect. Drumroll, please...

Best Personal Theatrical Experience: The first full run-through of Saturday's Warrior/The White Star. I really teared up when Jimmy reformed and saw Pam at the end of the show. Other than one little issue I had to deal with, working on the show was an incredible experience. I would give my right eye to work with Matt Neves again, and I would cast pretty much the entire cast any chance I could get. There was such an amazing atmosphere (which I credit to the Spirit, but that's another blog in and of itself) that I've never experienced working on another show. I secretly hope that I get asked to do the show again next year.

Best Professional Theatrical Experience: In the Heights. Holy freaking crap. Loved every minute of it. And I not only teared up, but for the first time ever, I CRIED at a show. Very moving. From the moment "Atencion" began to the moment "Everything I Know" ended, I had tears streaming down my face. I really was the ultimate fanboy after the show. Brilliant theatre.

Favorite Music: In the Heights, OneRepublic

Favorite TV: Mad Men, Fear Itself, Psych (the 80s prom episode was one of the best episodes of any show ever), The Soup

Favorite Movies: As if it wasn't obvious, The Dark Knight. I really loved WALL-E, though, and I quite enjoyed The X-Files: I Want To Believe.

Favorite Activities: Hooters & The Dark Knight with Emily, Matt, and Melinda; relaxing bbq with Taryn, Megan, Taven, and Holly; meeting Ashley Brown after Mary Poppins; catching a ghost on film in the form of an orb at the Winchester Mystery House

Best Personal Achievements: Teaching the advanced acting workshop for youth theatre and seeing the progression in some of the kids - I may not be the best actor, but dang, I can coach kids in it; Various cleaning projects - I've never had such clean and organized living space; rewriting the majority of the vocal parts in Saturday's Warrior/The White Star - I had a blast, and I was really proud of how they turned out, especially when I was told that Janice Kapp Perry was pleased with what I had done with WS

Best Purchases/Gifts: Batman lunchbox, license plate, and keychain from Teri & Bristol, new iPod, new car, New York souvenirs (especially my 30+ scripts that I bought from The Drama Book Shop)

That's about it for now. I may come back and add some more stuff if I remember something. It's late, afterall, I'm dead tired, and I've got school in the morning. UGH!!!!

Near.....Far!

Hooray! It's one of Jeremy's random blogs where he just lists things that make him happy/pleased and sad/angry. (Sometimes, it feels like that's all he does, actually...) Tonight's blog is brought to you by Grover. And the letter Z.

• The TV show Fear Itself. The first and second episode were so-so, but the third and fourth are AWESOME. I just watched the last three straight, when I should have been going to bed. I can't get enough. James Roday as a possible serial killer? BRILLIANT. (I finished that episode while I was writing this blog, and holy cow!)


• WALL-E was great. I was worried that I wouldn't like it, especially since I was so disappointed by Ratatouille. However, it was awesome. Best love story I've seen in a while, and best Pixar since Nemo.


• Family night with Teri and Bristol: we really do look like a family, and then we do strange things like split checks or go to different registers in the concessions line.


• People who take their toddlers to movies and then let them sit and fuss/scream for a full hour before taking them out really: HONESTLY.


• I only had 2 classes this last semester, but I got a 4.0. That's my first since being admitted into the education program. The previous two semesters, I got all A's and one B+ each. And the B+'s were in the stupid education classes. However- both classes this semester were education classes. I've finally broken the education curse.


• Teaching "vocal basics" classes for a youth theatre festival: I had it confirmed by a raise of hand that NONE of the kids from a certain local youth theatre know how to support or even what it is. Most of them also don't know how to breathe correctly while singing. How in the crap do you claim to teach your kids musical theatre if you don't teach them the bare essentials?!


• Recording Charlie Brown is really fun. I'm working really fast, and I'm liking everything I've come up with so far.


• I have two more shows lined up to "score." One is like a silent movie that I really will be underscoring, essentially. The other is just a play that I'll be pulling incidental music for. Both of them are for directors who I really like working with (in this capacity).


• I can now say I've music directed not only all over Utah County, but essentially the entire "Green Jell-O Belt" thanks to Saturday's Warrior. I've music directed for at least 8 theatres/companies that I can think of off the top of my head. However, there is one theatre that I've been dying to music direct at for YEARS. That theatre is doing not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 of my favorite musicals of all time in the near future, and it kills me that they have never asked me to MD for them. As much as I'm loving my break right now, if they asked me to MD one of those shows, I'd do it in a heartbeat. It's a lot easier to commit to an MD job than acting, because I don't have to be to EVERY rehearsal and performance.


• My nephew Zach is visiting, and he's so cuddly that it kills me. If his mother knew he was hugging me, reading with me, and playing with me so much, she'd choke. Hmm...maybe I should let her know...
  
• I get really tired of friends who guilt me all the time for not talking to them more and not making time for them, and yet they won't even read my stinking blog. Then when I see them, they expect me to fill them in on everything, when they could have just been reading it all along. Not that I expect everyone to read my blog, because frankly, if it wasn't my own, I probably wouldn't read it. But come on! If you think you have the right to guilt me for not seeing you more, then I expect you to at least read a stupid website. Especially when you spend a lot of time on the computer anyway, and when you have tried to guilt me for not looking at your own websites and shtuff.

I'm really tired now, so I think I'm heading to bed. Goodnight, Gracie. Goodnight, Moon. Goodnight, John Boy. Goodnight, Grover!!!

I'm Free To Do What I Want Any Old Time

Another semester has come and gone. I only had 2 classes, but they had so much homework that it didn't feel much different from spring semester. Both classes seemed like kind of a waste. I expect to get pretty good grades, and that worries me. How come I can't get good grades in the education classes that aren't a waste of time for me? Oh, that's right. The Education department is messed up. Oh, well. This semester, I did the following projects (and got 100% on most): a WebQuest about the validity of doing High School Musical in a high school, a digital story about plot-development and using Wicked as a well-developed plot, a book report on Black Like Me which resulted in my hating white people for a few minutes, an autobiography, a biography of Elfi Panholzer, and a paper comparing my autobiography to Elfi's biography. There were smaller assignments, too, but those were the big ones. And now, I have one more semester of actual classes, and then student teaching. There is a light at the end of the tunnel!!!

I also recently took the PRAXIS-II exam. It was a 100 question test about my knowledge of theatre. It was ridiculously stupid. It is designed for secondary education majors, and yet there were questions about elementary school kids' development. What the?! The biggest kicker, which makes me hate the state of Utah right now, is the fact that it doesn't even matter how I score on the test. If I get a 20% or a 100%, they don't care. They'll certify me just for taking it. LAME.

Saturday's Warrior/The White Star is up and running. It was an amazing experience until the end. The last week, the gloves were off, and somebody on the production staff became very selfish and non-collaborative. There are some gosh-awful things about the music that I wish more than anything I could fix, but I was told that my opinion doesn't matter on the issues. The reason that I hestitated to do the show came true there at the end, and the last few rehearsals I went to were miserable. However, I still love the cast, I still love the director, I still love the choreographer, and I'm still glad I did the show. It turned out pretty darn good, too. There are some aspects of the show I don't like (basically all the tech, the manipulative slide shows, the tracks that I couldn't fix), but overall, it's a good show. And it blows my mind to see how many people are going to see it.

If you read my blog, you know that I've been dying to act lately. I actually have some free time for once, and a director has pretty much offered me a great part in a good show, and I would be paid. However, I just can't bring myself to audition. I feel like I need to keep taking a break until the fall. Heaven knows what I'll be stuck doing at school then, and I don't want to go a whole school year without any free time again. If I get a break, it will make that tolerable. For the first time in years, I don't have a show lined up, and while it was stressful at first, I'm kind of enjoying it now. I'm also worried that the second I get involved in another show, the Elders' Quorum will suddenly need more of my attention. I guess I should pray about it, and fast. The auditions are soon.

Happy stuff now:

• I'm watching Alias right now. I haven't really watched it in two years, and it makes me very happy.
• I've been able to have a few scary movie nights with my nieces and nephews. The Eye wasn't as bad as I had feared. Jessica Alba is as wretched as ever, but the movie rose above my expectations.
• Lego Indiana Jones is pretty much the coolest thing ever. I've finished all of the levels, and now I'm going back through to pick up things I missed on the first go-round. It's so stinking addictive.
• It's summer, and that means I'm fully addicted to Otter Pops again. Gosh, I love those little frozen sticks of delight.
• I've been catching up with more friends lately. Last night was Taryn's last night in town, and also the only night she could get together, so we bbq'd with Holly, Tavin, Megan, and Taryn's friend Karen. (I missed Family Home Evening for it. Ssh! It'll be our little secret.) She brought pineapples, and right in front of my eyes, she cut one. And I ate it. And it was amazing. I've never had pineapple that fresh. I've only had it after it's been cut for a while. Oh, and since Taryn has sat by me at Church the last couple weeks, people in our ward think we're dating, which makes me giggle. As if I could ever get a tall, artsy drink of water like THAT!
• I get to sleep in as late as I want tomorrow, and Thursday, and Friday, and Saturday... I love the last week of a semester.
• I've started recording tracks for You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown, which I'm doing with youth theatre next year. I never knew the show until now, and I love it. I particularly love the chord progression at the end of "Happiness" when Lucy says the title line to Charlie. And I like the creative ways I'm using Schroeder onstage. He'll randomly play on his toy piano, and then it gradually fades into a full combo. Tomorrow, I'm going to record the title song. I'm excited.

That's it for now. Enjoy this funny video that brings me great joy:

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