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I’m really tired, but I’m clearing off my DVR tonight so that it doesn’t get too full while I’m gone for the rest of the week. It’s sad that my priority is TV and not packing. I will probably get to the competition and find that I forgot to pack underwear because I was so tired when I packed. Oh, well. Sometimes TV is worth going commando. In the meantime, I’m watching/recording stuff off my DVR and recording random thoughts.

I wish I was a better writer, like Trash or Julie. My blogs are more lists than actual writings lately, and that saddens me. I used to LOVE to write and always wanted to make it better. Now, I just throw a list together and call it good, like I’m a theatre reviewer for the Deseret News or something.

I’ve had a weird feeling all night. I can’t put my finger on it. I don’t know if it’s about Shakespeare Competition, Urinetown, or something else that’s not as present on my mind. Whatever it is, I’m not liking it, and I wish it would go away.

I also dislike feeling like somebody is bugged by me, and they won’t say why so I can fix whatever I’m doing to bug them. 9 out of 10 times that I feel this way, it’s usually me just being stupid/sensitive. But tonight, I had several moments, and I’m paranoid. It doesn’t help that I’ve had that other yucky feeling.

I’m not going to see Lauren again until Sunday. This sucks. Luckily, though, we live in an age where there are cell phones for texting and calling anytime. I could not have survived in Shakespeare’s time.

I want to be in a show. I want to perform somehow. It kills me that UVU is doing shows that I would love to be in – AFTER I’ve graduated. I know I’m not very good at acting and singing, and that I can’t ever get cast in anything but A Christmas Carol, but I’m dying to be on the other side of the table at auditions for once. I love directing. I like music directing. I LOVE teaching/coaching. I just miss the days when I balanced it better and went back and forth between music directing and acting. Sadly, I don’t see any performing in my future. As long as I don’t have a full-time job, I have to only do jobs where I can get paid, and acting isn’t one.

I don’t want to be sitting on a bus with students for 5 hours tomorrow. I bought some new headphones that are REALLY good at noise-canceling. We’re driving straight from Orem to St. George to see Aida at Tuacahn. Please, God, give me the strength to not kill any children.

I’m missing the following people right now (for different reasons): Grandma Orton, The Culps, Heidi T., Bryan, John, The Masons, Pre-Crazy/Skanky Mariah Carey

Saturday Night Live has not been funny this year. I think I’ve only chuckled a couple times so far. That was pretty funny when the new girl said the f word, though. And that freakish thing that was dancing inside a giant metal atom was pretty laughable. I’m told she’s some famous singer, though.

I think I’ve finally narrowed down my Halloween costume to a few choices. I’m not terribly excited about any of them, which leads me to believe that maybe I should just not dress up this year.

I’ve been blogging semi-regularly for 3 1/2 years, and while this isn’t a huge accomplishment, it’s pretty big for me. I’ve NEVER been good at keeping a journal, so it’s fascinating to go back and read my thoughts on what was going on and how I was feeling months or years ago. When I look back on this post, I’m going to think: “Wow. I was a real downer that night.”